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The Four Cats

Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.
The first man was an Engineer,
the second man was an Accountant,
the third man was a Chemist, and
the fourth man was a Government Employee.

To show off, the Engineer called his cat, 'T-square, do your stuff.'
T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle.

Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.

But the Accountant said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said,
'Spreadsheet, do your stuff"
Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies..

Everyone agreed that was good.

But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, 'Measure, do your stuff.'
Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured
exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop into the glass.

Everyone agreed that was also pretty good.

Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, 'What can your cat do?'

The Government Employee called his cat and said, 'CoffeeBreak, do your stuff.'
CoffeeBreak jumped to his feet......
ate the cookies........
drank the milk.......
sh*t on the paper.......
screwed the other three cats.......
claimed he injured his back while doing so.......
filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions.......
put in for Workers Compensation..............
and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave............

AND THAT, MY FRIEND, IS WHY EVERYONE WANTS TO BE A GOVERNMENT EMPLOYEE...


My two cats, Winston and Polly:
DSCF0384.JPG

Comments (15)

Kathy (Trekcapri):

Hi Anne, Oh this is too funny. Now although I work for a government entity, I promise I'm not like coffeebreak but I do know several people who are! :)

I love the photo fo Winston and Polly! Have a great weekend!

Anne:

LOL Kathy, Dave and I both work for government, but we're not like coffeebreak either, honest!

Funny! And I love that photo of Winston and Polly. Isn't it nice to catch them in the same photo?

Anne:

Sure was Annie, it's so rare to catch them both still at the same time, let alone still and close enough together to be in the same photo!

That is funny. Thanks for sharing. (btw, cute photo of the kitties).

Very funny, Anne. Thanks for sharing, I have not heard this one before. Hey, I want to work for the government too!

Anne:

Thanks Marta, glad you enjoyed it! And I agree, my cats are very cute ;)

Candi, yes join us, we're taking over the world...muahahahahaha!!!!

sandrac:

Clever cats! I love the photo of Winston and Polly, they both look so serene. And together, yet not really!

Please don't take my comment the wrong way, but lately as a government worker and a teacher who works hard and is tired of those in the private sector bashing us I liked the first 3 cats' skills better. All teachers who teach in the public school are state workers here in Hawaii. I do admit that there probably are lazy government workers and I know a few, but I have seen lazy private workers also and I know many government workers who work very hard. If it was a different time, I would probably laugh also, but right now in Hawaii, everyone is attacking government workers here, trying to cut our pay and our benefits, blaming us for the entire state economic problem so I am a little sensitive right now.

Anne:

Sandra, that sums those two up nicely...together, but not really!

girasoli, oh I can be very sensitive about the civil servant cliches myself (I work for my Provincial Government), so fully appreciate your point of view. Our civil service was pared down a few years ago and now everyone is running at full capacity and then some.

I doubt I would have found this funny if had heard it from someone in private sector, but came from a fellow gov worker (my hubby actually) and somehow struck my fancy, what can I say? :)

In many situations I would have laughed also...it has just been stressful and frustrating lately with all the state worker and teacher bashing going on here. Again...not offense taken :)

Anne:

girasoli, it sucks that you have to endure those kinds of attacks, I'm so sorry to know that you have to deal with that. We don't have much of that going on there, at least not these days. Which is good because I don't have much sense of humour when comments about gov workers are directed at me, have to say. In fact, I get rather defensive and cranky!

Thanks for the chuckle. Cute photo of the kittens. Love Polly's dreamy eyes.

Anne:

You're welcome, Maria! I love Polly's dreamy eyes, too. I would so love to know what was going on behind those eyes! It's one of those photos that makes me wonder just what do cats think about anyway?!

I think the attacks are getting worse lately with the terrible economy which has made me more sensitive (due to so many verbal attacks). The blame game of the lazy state workers - cut their pay, fire them all, etc. etc. It really is sad because the majority work their butts off.

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