Let us go then, you and I...

I've started a new category for my "church-y" posts. Church (unexpectedly) has become a large part of my life over the past few years. I love our minister, I enjoy being a member of a great congregational community, and most recently, belonging to our church choir. (A minor downside was "volunteering" to be Central Treasurer...when your minister asks a favour and says give it prayerful consideration before giving her your answer...who can say no?! But that's another story...)

I don't think of myself as an "organized religion" kind of person, but the United Church of Canada seems to fit my spiritual quest and my own sense of social justice. UCC is open and progressive, a very positive place...there is no fire and brimstone anywhere in sight! (Our minister doesn't even believe in Hell!) This path is more about growing the inner light within, and seeking and promoting justice and equality in the world. The old "be a better person" routine...which is easier said than done. I find that, although I don't need to attend church to stay in touch with my inner spirit, I usually feel rejuvenated and inspired by Rev. Valerie's musings each week ("sermon" often seems too formal a word for the thoughts she shares with us).

We are not alone. We live in God's world.

PS - come back on Feb 14 to "meet" my minister...

I should add that I have no intentions of posting bible-thumping, knocking-on-your-door-to-convert-you kind of entries. It is just where I will post my thoughts on matters spiritual to me - my own personal faith journal, after a fashion. As for having a separate category...well, I'm not sure why I want to keep these thoughts separate, perhaps simply to facilitate deletion in case I decide it's too much to share!

(In reality, I will probably spend most of my time talking about music that inspires me somehow...I love to sing, although with my limited talent, I will not be asked to sing a solo anytime soon!)

(Updated June/08: Well, it turns out I was asked to sing a solo - much to my surprise, it was a success!)

Blurb from "Jesus Walks" (Kanye West)

"They say you can rap about anything except for Jesus
That means guns, sex, lies, video tapes
But if I talk about God my record won't get played Huh?"

Most of the Christians I know (myself included) are quite repressed when it comes to proclaiming our faith from the rooftops. We don't necessarily want to be seen as enthusiastic followers of Christ: Christians yes, but "Lovers of Jesus"? Hmm...that smacks a little too much of rabid, born again evangelism...we collectively shudder in our polite, moderate congregations.

I think that reluctance to actively and visibly walk in the path of Jesus is certainly one of the reasons why, as Kanye writes, songs about God do not get much radio play...unless, of course, the songwriters happen to be U2!

I've been a huge U2 fan for years...my ears perked up at 1980's "I Will Follow", and when I heard "New Year's Day" a year or so later, I was hooked on this band. When The Joshua Tree album came out in 1987, I vaguely noticed the biblical references in the title and a few songs. But it was not until hearing the Rattle & Hum album a couple years later that I really tuned into the spiritual themes running rampant through so many of U2's lyrics.

I LOVE this song, and although I have no idea who the poster of this video is, but I echo her comment about this video. I too "hope my children lead a life uncommon".

I know my hope is rooted in reality. My heart swells with pride in my daughters and how they embody the spirit of this song:

"Lend out voices only to sounds of freedom
No longer lent out strength to that which we with to be free from
Fill you lives with love and bravery
And we shall lead a life uncommon"

V...is for Valentine's Day
V...is for Valerie

Valentine's Day is Valerie's birthday.

V...is also the third letter in the word loVe - which was angie's suggested topic for today.

So what better day to write about my minister, the lovely and talented Reverend Valerie?!

Show of hands: who would go to church more often if the minister was a vivacious, enthusiastic, soulful woman with the ability to make Scripture relevant? Well then come along to St. John's 'cause Reverend Valerie ROCKS!!

Here she is front and centre with the kids for children's time (I didn't take the photo, but it just so happens that's my daughter's head mid-photo peeking around Val's shoulder)

Part of Valerie's irresistible appeal is that she usually seems to be speaking straight from her heart; she rarely refers to any written notes. For example: one Sunday she was speaking about tolerance and acceptance of others. At one point, she told us how she was driving to church that morning telling her teenage daughter to be careful in choosing friends and not to get in with the wrong crowd. Then she says "that's when Jesus smacked me upside the head and said you're doing exactly the opposite of what you're going to stand up and preach about in church this morning"...in full Newfie accent (which almost always breaks through when she's animated).

And she really shakes things up from time to time. I've come to believe she'll try anything once. For example, the time our Sunday service turned into a cheerleading session...

In the opening pages of Christopher Moore's novel "Lamb, the Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Friend", is this quote attributed to Voltaire:
"God is a comedian playing to an audience that is afraid to laugh"

(Minor point of clarification: according to Wiki, the quote is misattributed to Voltaire, but was actually by H. L. Mencken: "Creator - A comedian whose audience is afraid to laugh")

In any case, it's a great quote - I see no reason why prayer must preclude humour. It seems acceptable to worship while in tears, why not also in the presence of laughter? Humour can bring people together, and brighten a dark day. To adapt a line from Bono (ref the Rattle and Hum CD): the God I believe in isn't short of laughs, mister! Humour - respectful humour, that is - can be a terrific way to diffuse a tense or awkward situation.

I highly recommend "Lamb..." to anyone open to an hilarious - yet through the profanity and goofiness, oddly sensitive - tale of the life of Jesus. I just lent it to Rev. Valerie and am most curious to know if she, as a member of the clergy, will find it as funny as did my daughter and I.

I never realized how many songs I knew by The Hooters until we got their compilation CD Hooterization: A Retrospective (which we found in the bargain bin at the Superstore). I did, however, know they sang All You Zombies, which is a song I have loved since its release in the (early?) 80's. But in my younger days, I just tuned into the chorus and the music, and never really "heard" the words. After I grow into my faith, I take more note of how very many spiritual and/or biblical references there are in the literature and music of our culture. So, now, I still love the music, but have a deeper appreciation for the lyrics. (For some reason, youtube has disabled embedding on this video, so click on the song title above to have a listen if you like.)

According to Songfacts:
"This was written by Rob Hyman and Eric Bazilian, who founded The Hooters. It is filled with biblical images and created some controversy. Said Hyman, "I think the spirituality of it wasn't premeditated. I think everyone is a spiritual person in whatever they believe or not. There was no real agenda on our part. I know it got banned on several stations, which interested us - there were some Christian stations that refused to play it. There were articles - we never understood the controversy that much, but it stimulated activity. For a writer, that's the best thing you can do."

I just found this in the WonderCafe Discussion Lounge...

DOG DIARY
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 PM - Lunch! My favorite thing!
1:00 PM - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 PM - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 PM - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 PM - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 PM - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 PM - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

CAT DIARY

Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are
fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt
for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something
in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going
is my dream of escape.

In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their
feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since
it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely
made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.
Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was
placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event.
However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard
that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must
learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.

Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of
my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must
try this again tomorrow -- but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and
snitches.

The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released - and
seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously mentally
challenged.

I also found this bobble head Jesus...who says organized religion has no sense of humour!

I love Palm Sunday. I love the fun and excitement when the kids are parading around the sanctuary with their palm leaves. I love the sense of throwing my lot in with Jesus - if I'd been around when he arrived in Jerusalem, I would definitely have jumped on his bandwagon! (or so I like to think...) And I love the anticipation of the upcoming Holy Week.

I also love this fresco, in the Scrovegni Chapel, of Jesus' entry into Jerusalem, by Giotto (although alas, I have not yet been to Padua to see it in person):

I have loved this musical since seeing it performed by a touring company at the Rebecca Cohn Auditorium in Halifax in the late seventies. After watching the movie a bunch on times on TV, I finally bought the DVD last year, although had already memorized the entire thing from listening to the CD over and over. If there is anyone left who has not yet seen this movie, I highly recommend it, even if you are not religious. (The hilarious Herod scene alone is worth the price of admission for any non-religious viewers!!) The costumes and language are oh so early seventies, but somehow don't come across as foolish, the movie still holds its power.

Rev. Valerie was showing the movie in church this evening...I had really wanted to go, but we ended up staying home and watching our copy. Mostly because we were all so tired, and I have a splitting headache (going on for three days now...blech!) Also I don't like crying in public (this movie always brings on the tears) because oh man, I am not a pretty weeper - I get all blotchy, I make loud noises, my nose gets red, etc. And finally, I have a hard time refraining from singing along since I know the words to all the songs - people generally don't like the person sitting next to them to be drowning out the movie!

Here's a youtube clip of what is supposedly the 1973 movie trailer:

What a busy Easter weekend!

The Good Friday service was emotional, as usual. I kept my tears at bay, but Ginger succumbed. After the service, Rev. Valerie hugged her for a long time, and told her that the great thing about Good Friday - and all the dark times in our lives - is that Easter Monday always comes. (Valerie knows about Ginger's depression and I was so moved by her compassion, and incredibly impressed by her ability to always find the right words that one needs to hear.)

After this service, Rev. Valerie's youngest daughter came home with us. She and Miss Ninja are great friends, so I wasn't surprised when the two of them cooked up a sleepover (or rather two sleepovers, one at our house, the next night at hers.)

It's nice having the girls' friends over for sleepovers, although Dave sometimes finds the commotion a bit hard to take (he has noise issues...) We played the new version of Life last evening. What fun! This is a neatly updated version of the old Game of Life. I love board games, and card games. I used to love outdoor running around games, but haven't as much energy as I did when I was ten! Still love croquet though.

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us most. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in all of us. And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

I believe Nelson Mandala quoted the above in his inauguration speech. How moving and profound are these words. It is indeed difficult to let our own light shine.

I often find myself belittling my own talents. I am prone to believing that if I am good at something, it must be so easy that anyone could do it. (Of course that can lead to impatience with those of lesser abilities, my mental dialogue often sounds like this: "argh, how can this person not 'get it', this is child's play for heaven's sake!") But I am getting much better at recognizing my own talents and trying to share them, rather than assuming I have nothing of value to share. We can more easily share our gifts if we acknowledge that we have something worth sharing in the first place!

On a more selfish note, I am also learning to accept a compliment gracefully. I had showed my Valentine entry to Valerie and (after telling me that I can talk about her behind her back anytime I want) she said that she happens to think I'm pretty amazing myself. My normal reaction would be to brush such a compliment off as undeserved, but I am not doing that anymore. I am going to accept the kind words and just feel good about it. Because who am I not be amazing?! And when I feel good about myself, I have more strength and energy to share with others.

Chiocciola's post about Zimbabwe inspired me to read recent new stories this morning and follow the election coverage more closely. The news is not encouraging but I add my prayers for change to the many being said around the world on this day of their election.

The election rigging appears to be so blatant. One wonders how Mugabe can imagine people will believe his claim that he wouldn't be able to sleep if he thought the election was rigged...well he probably doesn't imagine any such thing since it hardly matters who believes him when he has the police, army and prison services on his side.

BBC says:
"Across the country, there were reports of voters not being allowed to cast ballots - either because their names were not on the voters' roll or because they were trying to vote in the wrong ward."

And on this page, they are gathering observations from the voters, such as the following.
1430 GMT Radcliffe, near Kwekwe: Georgina says:
"I went to four different polling stations in the area and my name was not on any of the voters' rolls, even though I checked two weeks ago to make sure, and my name was on the voters' register then.

My grandmother's name was on the roll but she was told she could not vote this time, even though she has voted in all previous elections - she is 78. However, seven members of my family who have all passed away were on the list, including my uncle, who died a week ago and was an MDC member of parliament.

This is very disturbing for us. But we are not the only ones. Out of the four polling stations I went to, I would say half of all the people who turned up were turned away. They still took everyone's names however, including my neighbours.

I was hoping to vote for Morgan Tsvangirai and I am afraid they will attribute my vote to Zanu-PF. The same thing must be happening across the country and it will probably mean another Zanu-PF victory. It's very sad."

The first gift:
...is none other than my minister and friend, Rev. Valerie. She was there for my sister and me, and the rest of our family, all through Floyd's illness and death, providing practical advice, or simply giving a hug and sharing stories, whatever was needed. From lifting our spirits with laughter, to arranging for meals to arrive, to just being there with loving compassion and a peaceful presence, and making us feel like she had all the time in the world for our needs, she herself is a gift from God.

The second gift:
...is a beautiful prayer shawl. Valerie was with us in the hospital one day, when she pulled two prayer shawls out of her bag and wrapped them around our shoulders, saying "May you always feel the arms of God around you". These shawls are made by the women of a local prayer ministry, who knit (or crochet) them while praying thoughts of healing and comfort. The miraculous feeling of peace and comfort that comes from wearing my prayer shawl is another amazing gift from God.

The spirit moved me to go to the ocean yesterday...I packed a picnic lunch and a book (Donna Leon's Doctored Evidence) and headed off to Chebucto Head.

I have been going out to this place since I was about 17. It is one of my absolute favourite spots in all the world...my soul finds peace here on the rocks, as I inhale the salt air and listen to the roar and shush of the ocean.

"And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus."
(Philippians 4:7)

"May God, who clothes creation in love mend each rift and strengthen each seam, that threads of hope and strands of healing may be woven wherever we journey."
(Rev. Valerie)

Here are some of the photos I took...

Funny how much a song's meaning can be affected by mood or thought. I'd always thought of Faith Hill's That's How Love Moves as a typical romantic love song...and judging from the youtube videos, so does everyone else. In fact I couldn't find one that didn't have a cheesy soap opera romance going on in the background, hence the following audio link only.

Ah, but today I was listening with different ears. Today, this sounded like a love song to God.

This morning, I'd reread Rev. Valerie's weekly email to the congregation in which she spoke of the Spirit being like the wind:

Sometimes the Spirit’s presence is like a hurricane, at other times a soft gentle breeze but always it touches us in some way that changes our reality.

With that in mind, I was listening to these lyrics, and it struck me that the Spirit is also much "like a river running through you". It can be strong enough to carry you through the rapids, other times is so calm that you can see yourself reflected in it. The rest of the lyrics fit too. It can definitely feel like "the miracle that makes me everything I am". The Spirit's presence can also feel like "the voice of love calling, without making a sound", it can "consume you", can be "a whisper" or "a storm". "Sometimes it lifts you high as Heaven"...

Listening with ears and heart open to the presence of God, this song took on a whole new meaning for me.

The words, especially the first verse, also remind me of two people who helped me to open my heart to the Spirit. When I started attending church few years ago, I was by and large surrounded by people who thought of church as an obligation, a tedious experience to be endured only when necessary. (One friend was once ridiculing "church geeks" - you know, those weirdos who sit up front, bopping along to the music, actually enjoying the service...er, that would be me!) Not the easiest atmosphere in which to embark on a journey of faith. I am blessed to have encountered two vastly different people whose ministries have enabled me to find the courage to continue my journey, and openly embrace my inner church geek!

The United Church of Canada invites people to use the following prayer for the people of Myanmar.

O Holy One, who speaks to us out of the whirlwind,
revealing how limited is our power,
how vulnerable is our existence,
how fragile our survival,
once again the winds and the waves have devastated a portion of your good earth,
your creation has been laid waste in Myanmar.
By the tens of thousands, your human children
have drowned, have been battered lifeless, and
now countless are left without shelter or home risking disease and death.
Our lamentations rise with our fear-filled rage at this loss, suffering,
and the senselessness of it all.
We cannot undo what has happened,
but fervently invite your embracing presence and love
for all who have died,
for all who are wounded,
for all who are grieving.
Let neither the dead nor the living be far from your Spirit,
they are all with you.

Gracious and generous One,
you love the world and all its people—your global household.
We pray for all who are witnesses to this destruction and death.
Near and far, weak and powerful, rich and poor—
we, who have been spared this killer cyclone,
observe and can hardly credit what we see.
As we watch brief video clips and read news reports,
your Spirit moves our hearts to compassion and generosity.
We rejoice in all who put mind, body, and soul into rescue, relief, and restoration efforts.
We welcome opportunities to give so that life may continue.
We pray, move the hearts of those in power in Myanmar to transcend self-interest
so that the freely-given help and aid may reach
the needy, the distressed and all suffering because of this calamity.
We pray in Jesus Christ, by whom we know your Way, your Truth, and your Life.
AMEN
(Scripture references: Job 40:6; Psalm 139:7, 18)

The Ginger was thrilled to tell me that the California Supreme Court struck down the state's ban on same-sex marriage.

As past cases establish, the substantive right of two adults who share a loving relationship to join together to establish an officially recognized family of their own — and, if the couple chooses, to raise children within that family — constitutes a vitally important attribute of the fundamental interest in liberty and personal autonomy that the California Constitution secures to all persons for the benefit of both the individual and society.

Furthermore, in contrast to earlier times, our state now recognizes that an individual’s capacity to establish a loving and long-term committed relationship with another person and responsibly to care for and raise children does not depend upon the individual’s sexual orientation, and, more generally, that an individual’s sexual orientation — like a person’s race or gender — does not constitute a legitimate basis upon which to deny or withhold legal rights. We therefore conclude that in view of the substance and significance of the fundamental constitutional right to form a family relationship, the California Constitution properly must be interpreted to guarantee this basic civil right to all Californians, whether gay or heterosexual, and to same-sex couples as well as to opposite-sex couples.

Each week on Thursday, Rev. Valerie sends an email to our entire congregation (or at least to those who've provided their email addresses) as a way of keeping in touch between Sundays. This email is often a newletter of sorts, telling us what's going on in upcoming Sundays, letting us know who is need of our prayers and support through difficult times, keeping us up to date on our sponsored refugee family's situation, and other congregational news. Or it might be a call to offer up our talents toward various ministries, such as youth group, prayer shawls, funerals, music, etc. Recently she invited us to "give some prayerful consideration to what your gifts are and if, in fact, you are being called by God". She wrote: "I do not yet know your name but I do know God is calling – Do you not hear?"

Other weeks, her emails are reminders to "take the time to experience the presence of God in the people around you and the places you find yourselves in. In the darker moments and in those times of complete joy, God is there and we are indeed blessed."

But today, her email included a reflection on our coastal drive, which I wrote about yesterday, so I want to share it with you in full...

I received this in an email recently...

Two friends were walking through the desert. During some point of the journey, they had an argument; and one friend slapped the other one in the face

The one who got slapped was hurt, but without saying anything, wrote in the sand:

“Today my best friend slapped me in the face.”

They kept on walking, until they found an oasis, where they decided to take a bath.

The one who had been slapped got stuck in the mire and started drowning, but the friend saved him.

After he recovered from the near drowning, he wrote on a stone:

"Today my best friend saved my life"

The friend who had slapped and saved his best friend asked him, "After I hurt you, you wrote in the sand and now, you write on a stone, why?"

The friend replied "When someone hurts us we should write it down in sand, where winds of forgiveness can erase it away.

But, when someone does something good for us, we must engrave it in stone where no wind can ever erase it."

Learn to write your hurts in the sand and to carve your benefits in stone.

Recently my daughter told me that a friend's parents had offered to pick her up at our house, take her to her friend's bowling party, and then drive her home again. I said oh no, I would come get her after the party, as there was no need for them to do all that driving. She replied forcefully “Mum, they offered to bring me home, and if someone offers something, you have to accept, otherwise they’ll think you don’t like them”. I assured her they won’t think any such thing, and explained that whether or not we accept someone’s offer has nothing to do with whether or not we like them.

And yet later that evening, as I read an email from my own friend who was turning down an offer I had made, I found my daughter's words echoing in my head. Why, knowing there's not a shred of truth to it, would such a thought enter my mind? And yet strangely it did. Even though I fully understood my friend’s reason for saying "thanks for the thought, but no". Even though I knew the reason she didn't want my company had nothing to do with me in particular, she just wanted to take some time for herself. Even though I myself sometimes choose solitude over the company of friends and family.

I am a hypocrite in the face of my own insecurity. I wonder if this is normal. I wonder if my insecurity is a burden for my friends...I hope not.

O, Insecurity, you curious beast...how do I hate thee? Let me count the ways...

I hate when the fear of perceived rejection paralyzes and weakens me. I hate when ridiculous and irrational thoughts crawl out of my brain and swirl around my mind. I hate that, even though I recognize their absurdity, those thoughts still lead me to a place of withdrawal. I turn inward and circle the wagons, determined not to risk rejection again.

But then I always do...risk rejection again, I mean. Because, in spite of my insecurity, being open to possibility lifts my spirit and fills me with joy. I love that moment of optimism and hopeful expectation when possibilities seem endless. I love when I am not bogged down with doubt. So I try to find the courage to offer my support, my friendship, my talents, before insecurity silences me.

(By the way, I am offering my voice in church on Sunday. It is my first time singing at the microphone. I don't know how this happened! I am both afraid and proud of myself. My choir friends lift me with their encouragement. I pray for the courage to sing with joy. I'll let you know how it goes.)

Naturally, things don't always turn out quite how I'd anticipated. Such as when what I offer, with the best of intentions, is not what is wanted. When insecurity gets the better of me, which happens more often than I'd like, I retreat behind a curtain of aloofness. But when I feel stronger, I realize the important thing was to have offered in the first place, and I trust that it was appreciated, even if not accepted. This strength comes faster than it used to; I suspect this has much to do with my growing faith.

I am reminded of something Valerie said in her sermon last Sunday about the joy of knowing Someone cares. It's certainly true for me that feeling wrapped in the arms of God is joyful and powerful and strengthening...such unconditional love and acceptance blows my insecurity away. Without being burdened with insecurity, I do not take it personally that my friend did not want my company, and am able to feel glad she is taking some well deserved time for herself. I am content to accompany her in thought and prayer only. Perhaps she will want me to join her on another journey...but if not, I'm pretty sure I won't take that as a sign she doesn't like me :)

A few months ago, Rev. Valerie had asked Ginger if she would give a reflection on Grad Sunday (today). Ginger agreed. Weeks passed without inspiration. One particularly bad day, she almost called Valerie to say she couldn't do this after all. But she decided to give it a bit more time and see if the words would come. A few days ago, she managed to put a few thoughts on paper, but said it was only about 30 seconds worth and she thought it was stupid. I read it and (honestly) assured her it was not. She planned to finish it Friday since she had no school, but was not feeling very optimistic that she'd be able to find anything interesting to say. I suggested that perhaps she might include a poem, song lyric, favourite passage from a book, etc. if she needed to, in order to find the inspiration that was eluding her. I also reminded her to have faith in herself and to believe that her words are of interest to others.

When I got home Friday evening and read her draft, I was so impressed by what she wrote. Afterward, several people commented on how moved they were by her words. One woman said that she was especially touched because her son also suffers from depression. I know that my own eyes welled up with tears while listening to my beautiful daughter speak of her pain. At the same time, my heart swelled with love and pride at her courage in speaking about her depression so openly. She is an amazing, strong, generous young woman who has so much to offer. Dave and I are incredibly proud of her.

Without further ado, here is the text of her reflection:

Hooray, I survived my first solo performance! Amazingly, I was hardly nervous at all, it was a wonderful feeling to share this uplifting and joyful song with everyone. (Singing the line "I can feel this God song rising up in me" felt quite literally true.)

My family - including Dave for once! - was in the pews beaming encouragement at me. My younger daughter even gave me a thumbs up at the end...how cool is that? And quite a few people offered kind words after the service, so I guess I must have sounded ok. (Er, unless of course everyone was just being polite...but I don't think that was the case!) The only disappointing part about today was that Valerie was away so had to miss my big "debut" as well as Ginger's incredibly moving reflection. Janice (our church's staff associate) lead the services in Valerie's absence and was wonderful...but it wasn't quite the same :(

During children's time, Janice talked about Psalm 86 (at least I think that's what she said), in terms of how we act when afraid (of the dark, of rejection, of whatever makes us fearful), and how we can get strength and comfort from God at these times...which I thought was very interesting, especially considering my musings last week about insecurity.

My friend Brent told me he recorded the service today (audio only, I think) and that he'd give me a copy of the recording. He said he wants to keep a copy for himself too, and then went on to say that Valerie always gets a copy "because she's second to God, you know, and that's only if God keeps on his toes"...he cracks me up with his quirky sense of humour.

Anyway, once I have the recording, and if I can figure out how, maybe I'll upload my own rendition here. In the meantime, if you're interested to hear the song I chose, here's a random version from youtube:

I bought it for myself, of course. Yeesh, can't a grown woman buy herself a book without everyone thinking she's lost her marbles? Just because the book is aimed at preschoolers...hey, my inner child stomped her foot and said "I want that!!", what can I say?! :o)

I was browsing the bookshelves the other day (what else is new...) and I came across Guido's Gondola, a delightful children's book. Lovely illustrations, a heartwarming message told in rhymes, and Venice!! What more could one need from a book?

The blurb on the back is as follows:

"Guido spends his days shuttling tourists along the waterways of Venice in a small gondola. The kindhearted young rat enjoys the simple pleasures of his world–until his eyes are opened to the possibilities of all that could be accomplished with a larger, faster vessel. As Guido is persuaded to acquire bigger and better boats, life becomes increasingly complicated. Just how far will he go in his search for true satisfaction?

You and your child will giggle your way through this enchanting story of a small rat with a big heart, who learns the hard way that it’s the little joys of life that matter most."

The author includes this passage on her dedication page:

Better one handful with tranquility than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind. Ecclesiastes 4:6

Amen to that!