Sunday is Mother's Day again.
This will be the first Mother's Day since my mom passed, last November.
One thing I have to do is avoid the card section in the store.
Mother's Day cards.
Elegant cards covered with flowers, scrolling fonts, iridescent sparkley things over top of the flowers...my mom loved them all.
The glitzier, the better!
She would read the outside, open the card and then read the verse and whatever I'd written on the inside.
Then, she'd read it again, running her hands over the place where I'd written my "I love you's"...
Then, when she thought I wasn't looking, she'd surreptitiously turn the card over and quickly scan the back of the card to see how much it cost!
We always joked about how much I loved her each year.
She'd read the back of the card and then look at me over the top of her glasses and smile, telling me, "You love me $5.50 worth this year!"
I miss her so much.
I still have the Christmas gift that I bought for her, sitting in my office at work, waiting to be mailed.
I don't have the heart to give it away, recycle it or donate it.
I'm not sure why I'm keeping it, but I think I'll know when to give it away...
when I won't want to look at it sitting there, anymore.
I wish there was a way to go to the store and buy a beautiful Mother's Day card and write in it, "I love you so much and I'm so happy that you are my mom," and then give it to someone else.
Someone who doesn't get Mother's Day cards and is saddened every single year, because there's no one to send her luscious, sparkley floral cards with love written inside.
I don't know who that would be and how I would do that, so I've tucked the idea back in my mind.
It's the strangest thing...some women I know whose mothers are still alive have such issues with their moms, such fights and arguments. Those of us who have lost our moms would give anything to trade places with these women, to be able to have our own moms back again, for a few days, a few weeks...
The same day my son was born.
He was my Mother's Day gift.
My daughter was my Valentine's Day gift.
May 13th, this year...
Happy Mother's Day, Mom!
Happy Mother's Day.
I love you.