Today would have been my brother's birthday. He should be 56 years old today.
Instead he is perpetually a young man in the minds of all his friends and family.
It was always hard for me to believe his age, anyway. He was such a Peter Pan. To the end he had a childlike openess and unselfconcious ability to enjoy the smallest of experiences.
So, when he died, 15 years ago at the age of 41, he seemed much younger.
Dan lived a full rich life in those 41 years. AIDS took him before we were all ready to lose him.
Dan loved anything to do with ancient Egypt. He was facinated with the tombs of the Pharoahs. So, his best friend, Ellen, and I felt it was only fitting that we send him into the afterlife with the same fanfare.
We filled his coffin with all of his favorite things. Everything we could fit in. Favorite tools. Favorite foods. Favorite drinks. Favorite clothes. Pictures of all the people and pets he loved. Books about the places he had visited, and books about the places he still wanted to go.
So, happy birthday, Danny. Your older brother and sister were at dinner together on your birthday. We were thinking of you with love and laughter. Lots of Danny stories were shared.
Comments (15)
Deborah, what a special tribute to your brother. Thanks for sharing this.
Posted by kaydee | February 4, 2009 10:26 PM
Posted on February 4, 2009 22:26
Happy Birthday, Danny! It sounds like you were definitely loved and you are missed. How nice that you and your brother had dinner together on Danny's birthday.
Posted by girasoli | February 4, 2009 10:33 PM
Posted on February 4, 2009 22:33
What a touching post. Thanks for sharing.
Posted by Cindy Ruth | February 4, 2009 10:45 PM
Posted on February 4, 2009 22:45
Deborah, What a nice way to remember someone you love... to continue celebrating his life...
Posted by Eden | February 5, 2009 12:08 AM
Posted on February 5, 2009 00:08
Deborah - what a beautiful tribute to Dan. I can think of few better ways to remember those we love than getting together with friends and family over a good meal and reminiscing.
Posted by Jerry | February 5, 2009 6:24 AM
Posted on February 5, 2009 06:24
Beautiful post that's brought a lump to my throat. I love that you sent him into the afterlife with all his favorite things.
Posted by Annie | February 5, 2009 8:58 AM
Posted on February 5, 2009 08:58
What a beautiful way to remember someone you love and a lovely tribute to a much loved brother.
Posted by Maria I. | February 5, 2009 10:57 AM
Posted on February 5, 2009 10:57
Very touching post, thanks for sharing.
Posted by candi | February 5, 2009 11:21 AM
Posted on February 5, 2009 11:21
And how wonderful that Danny's sibs could be together this week to share a meal, raise a glass and tell the family tales. Thanks for sharing.
Posted by Marcia | February 5, 2009 12:01 PM
Posted on February 5, 2009 12:01
Very sweet post. Happy birthday, Danny.
Posted by Amy | February 5, 2009 4:05 PM
Posted on February 5, 2009 16:05
A beautiful post. Happy Birthday Danny. You were blessed with one amazing sister.
Posted by Kim | February 5, 2009 7:59 PM
Posted on February 5, 2009 19:59
Thank you for sharing this very special part of your life with us. It's clear that you have and have had a really close relationship with your brothers. Loss of a loved one cuts like a knife but sweet memories certainly help soothe the pain.
Posted by Barb Cabot | February 5, 2009 8:26 PM
Posted on February 5, 2009 20:26
Very lovely post. Thanks for sharing about Danny, and how great that you were able to celebrate his life with family!
Posted by Palma | February 6, 2009 10:51 AM
Posted on February 6, 2009 10:51
A lovely post, Deborah, and a wonderful tribute to your brother.
Posted by sandrac | February 6, 2009 10:14 PM
Posted on February 6, 2009 22:14
Ahh, Deborah, I can certainly understand how you are feeling about Danny's loss.
You may have seen that I posted a similar Happy Birthday entry to my own brother on Jan. 15th. He would have been 60 this year but died at the hands of a drunk driver when he was 34.
I wonder what our brothers would have been like as they matured.
Anyway, it was a lovely tribute.
Posted by nancyhol | February 6, 2009 10:22 PM
Posted on February 6, 2009 22:22