Self flagellation - punishment inflicted on oneself.
I am experience some of these self flagellations right now... in many areas too.
In my academic life, I have to have to have a mentor, my university professor - to guide me in the dissertation writing. I pay what seems like an arm and a leg towards tuition for an 8-week course. Who knows how many 8 week courses I am going to need at this speed that I am going through now!
What was I thinking when I enrolled in this course???????? I send parts of my dissertation to my mentor. She is supposed to give me feedback. The feedback I get sounds like this " Read this and revise" and the mentor refers me to various books and other professors' lecture. I ask what part needs revising and no reponse. Why am I paying someone who won't work with me?This is supposed to be a one-on- one course.
Maybe I do not really have a mentor --- more like a "tormentor" right now.
Personally life dished me some aggravation as well. I organized a retirement party for a colleague. A retired teacher, who was a former colleague of mine wanted to work with me on the event. I stupidly said yes. She wanted all the RSVPs and wanted to take charge of the finances. Well, two days before the event... she decided that she couldn't help out and turned over stuff to me. I sorted everything out, and did pull together a retirement party.. Why do I do this to myself?
Was it Eleanor Roosevelt who said that one can only be taken advantage of with their permission? I need to take Eleanor's words to heart!
I sometimes read blogs where the bloggers are complaining and venting about various people or someone they know. I thought that practice is something I did not like to see ... and here I am doing it! Something is wrong! with me!
Comments (4)
Eden - it is a great way to get things out of your system. Keep that all bottled up and you'll get an ulcer!
Your mentor is a twit. At the level of study you should have far more interaction. I'd request a different mentor.
Posted by Jerry | June 6, 2008 3:46 PM
Posted on June 6, 2008 15:46
Oh no, there's nothing wrong with you, Eden. Honestly, yours isn't one of "those" blogs - letting off a little steam is a far cry from spewing a constant stream of negativity.
(I think you should be congratulating yourself for pulling the retirement party together in spite of that woman bailing out at the last minute!)
Posted by Anne | June 6, 2008 5:56 PM
Posted on June 6, 2008 17:56
Eden, what Jerry and Anne said! You have every right to let off a little steam (and it really is good for you!)
And you certainly should be able to request a real mentor, rather than your tormentor. I think sometimes people are pushed into becoming mentors when they really don't have the right personality or skills for it.
You deserve better.
Posted by sandrac | June 9, 2008 6:45 PM
Posted on June 9, 2008 18:45
Thank you everybody! It continues to be an exercise in frustration with my mentor, so I am looking for a new one...
And thank you for the supportive words when I was letting off some steam.
Amy, I do not know why your comments do not show up when I clicked "publish" but I want to wish you luck and happy writing for your masters thesis... I remember the days... LOL
Posted by Eden | June 9, 2008 9:08 PM
Posted on June 9, 2008 21:08