I was one of two guest speakers at a luncheon called, "Inspiring Women". The first speaker spoke on "Women Managing Money", and my topic (during dessert), was "Women and Relationships".
Women in our mothers' and grandmothers' generation, for the most part, wanted a "Companionable Marriage". They hoped for a good guy, who would earn a living, help raise children, and as long as he didn't beat them, or blatently cheat on them, they stayed forever. (I know this is a gross generalization.) Women today (who choose to marry) want an "Intimate Marriage"... a partner, a best friend, a lover, someone who communicates, shares feelings, and someone they can trust to be their most vulnerable selves with. We're not asking much!
We have changed, and men have not. We have been "liberated", empowered, are less dependent, and have redefined what we want. We have also been confusing men with what we want for decades. Remember "Happy Days"? Did we want responsible, nice guy, Richie Cunningham? or funny Ralph? or cute Potzie? NO! We wanted the FONZ!
We may have grown up watching "Father Knows Best", Ozzie and Harriett, and Ward and June Cleaver, but now we'd like our partners to be a cross between George Clooney and Jack Baur! The group cracked up when I said we may have closer to a Fred Flintstone on viagra at home! (not MY Brad, or course!)
I gave examples of what women try, or do when they are frustrated with a relationship, as well as several strategies that are more effective. Then I had ten minutes of anonymous questions from the audience collected in a box during lunch.
It was a very well-received talk, and quite fun to give!
Here is the lovely lunch:
chicken, salmon, spinach and fruit salad