Palmabella's Passions

Tonight I am giving a training to new or unlicensed therapists (we call them Marriage Family Therapist Interns in California) on how to work with couples. It is a two-hour training at my house.

My handouts are printed, I have lots of good info for them on assessment and treatment, techniques to build communication, manage anger and build intimacy with couples, and how to work with couples on the verge of divorce. We will also discuss how to "end well", if a couple decides to split up.

Here are the four things guaranteed to harm a marriage:

criticism
contempt and lack of respect
defensiveness and blaming
Ignoring issues by avoiding them

There are "solutions" to all of these!

The big question is what will I bake to serve for dessert?

When I think of Rome, I also think of a lovely day trip to the beautiful Villa d'Este.

Grab a beverage of choice, and enjoy a few minutes in this SPECTACULAR setting.

When we were last there, we saw a bride and groom. Oh what stunning photos they must have!

Have you ever longed for a special spot, a quiet retreat, a relaxing hide-away? I remember building a "secret fort" with neighborhood friends (right there in my neighbor's back yard), when I was a child.

In the desert, many homes come with a "casita", intended as a detached guest room with bath. My casita is my private practice office where I see clients for therapy. I have often fantasized how it would look as my "art and craft studio" instead. My friend often sends her husband to their casita, when annoyed with him! That is desert lingo for "in the doghouse".

We were in Redlands, CA today, and passed this home in a quiet residential neighborhood. How cool is this tree house? I wonder if it is for the kids, the grandchildren, or a spouse's private spot to get away from the world?

When I put Dolce Italiano on my Christmas list (because I had already read it cover to cover in Barnes & Noble), I also was wise enough to put the mini bundt cake pan from Williams-Sonoma on my list too. Brad LOVES grappa, so I figured he'd want me to make these enough to pop for the pan as a "stocking stuffer". My plan worked!

I decided to try out three different flavors:

See that pretty bottle of grappa? I once HAND CARRIED two of those suckers home from Italy. One was a gift for my cousin, Gary. The other, I figured would make a lovely centerpiece when empty with a single stem Casablanca lily in it.

The cork was stuck. I tried a corkscrew (too fat). I tried an ice pick (no luck). I tried a skewer, and ended up with half a cork and the skewer attached in the bottle!

I made three syrups:

I added a vanilla bean to the grappa, and lemon zest to the limoncello.

My batter grew to a huge amount. I divided it equally into three bowls. I added grappa to one, Amaretto to the second, and limoncello and zest to the third before folding one-third of the egg whites to each. I ended up with 22 mini cakes! All three cakes were delicious, but the lemon was voted #1, with the Amaretto a close second place. Next time I may try Frangelico.

We took a "day trip" to Redlands, CA (about 50 minutes away) to try a restaurant I recently heard about, Farm Artisan Foods. It was a wonderful treat!

The restaurant is smart looking with a clean, simple decor, nice bar, white tablecloths, and a single calla lily on each table.

The Farm opened in 2003, and is owned by my friend, Elizabeth's, son-in-law, Roberto Argentina. Roberto was born in Brindisi, Italy, and grew up on his family's farm. After being a theater major during his university days in Texas, he moved to Chicago and trained for his career as a chef with Chef Keith Luce, a former chef at the White House. He moved to southern California and worked with the fabulous Chef Joachim Splichal.

We were welcomed by our waitress, Colleen, with hot, fresh focaccia. The lunch special included choices of an appetizer, an entree, dessert AND a glass of wine, ALL for $25.00!

I began with a beautiful salad with a mustardy dressing, wedge of brie, and lovely presentation of veggie garnishes on the plate.

Brad started with lentil soup that he enjoyed. The lentils were in a light briny broth.

I WILL eat gelato at Giolitti and San Crispino, and try new flavors I have never ordered before.

I WILL eat fried artichokes in the Jewish ghetto.

I WILL do coffee taste tests at Tazza D'Oro and St. Eustachio.

I WILL spend some quality time at the Testaccio Market (and hopefully find some treats to share in Montisi).

I WILL enjoy meeting new and old friends at a Slow Travel GTG!

I WILL finish re-reading Angels and Demons before we take 3 Millennia's "Unofficial Angels and Demons Tour" with Tony da Roma.

I WILL order pasta "caccio e pepe" at a trattoria.

I WILL spend hours enjoying Brad's company while sipping vino at Cul de Sac.

I WILL visit Volpetti for more treats.

I WILL hunt through at least four carefully scoped out kitchen stores for gifts for MY kitchen.

I WILL enjoy time wandering and eating in Trastevere.

I WILL visit the Bramante Cloister at Santa Maria Della Pace.

I WILL have a rooftop drink with a view at Hotel Eden. No talking me out of this one. I have wanted to do this on every trip to Rome. I don't care WHAT they charge for a drink!

I WILL treat Brad to a special "birthday dinner" at Agata e Romeo.

I WILL have fresh flowers from the Campo in the apartment every day.

Photos are courtesy of Rome.info

I don't have a cocktail very often, but when I do, I have a couple favorites.

If I'm not drinking wine, I prefer something light and tasty, but not too sweet.

My all time favorite drink is a Lemon Drop. Here is my recipe for a PERFECT batch:

1/2 c. Citron vodka
1/2 c. Triple Sec
3 T. freshly squeezed lemon juice
1/4 c. Sweet and Sour
a splash of 7-up of other citrus soda

Rim glass with sugar (I use lemon sugar), Shake with ice, and pour.

I also love what I call a "Buona Sera" (very similar to a pomegranate "martini", but lighter, bubbly, and with fewer calories).

1 shot of Pomegranate vodka
5 oz of Trader Joe's Sparkling Pomegranate Juice
a squeeze of fresh lemon juice

After dinner drink? I usually go straight to coffee after dinner. Once a Las Vegas bartender made me one of these: (I call it a "Buona Notte")

1 shot Vanilla Vodka
1 Shot Kahlua
Coffee or espresso

Stay tuned tomorrow for the drinks we "created" for the gang in Montisi.

When I am cooking in Montisi for Gail's group, Brad is happy to take on bartender duties. Last Sunday, Brad and I created some cocktails with our friends in mind.

The "Great Escape":
1/2 ounce Amaretto
1/2 ounce Grand Marnier
1 ounce orange juice
Fill glass with Prosecco

How about a "Bella Bugalu"? Fun and "slightly twisted"!

1 oz. Grand Marnier or other orange liquore
1 oz. cranberry juice
fill glass with prosecco and twist of orange

Jerry was more of a challenge. I know he likes rum and gin. Brad decided since we would be in Italy, Campari would be in order. So.......... "Le DeQuetteville":

Dash of gin (or vodka)
2 dashes Campari
Top with 5 oz. of Prosecco. Twist a mint leaf and discard. Garnish with a twist of orange and lemon.

There always seems to be a thread on Slow Talk about "packing light". Some are able to pack for weeks in one carry-on bag. Others wash out clothes every night and wear them again. Jerry just blogged about why he also brings plenty of clothes and shoes.

I guess if one is traveling by train, or alone, or going somewhere (I can't imagine where this would be) where they won't see anyone, and if they don't ever take photos with themselves in the picture, then maybe a case could be made for the freedom of one bag. I figure, I can handle my luggage, Brad puts the bags in and out of the car (only once this trip), and a driver will meet us and deliver us to our apartment in Rome. I like to dress for dinner, match accessories, and be what I call "appropriate", SO... I am packing Palmabella style.

I have gotten better. I have my 28" bag (with lots of room at 47 lbs, and a second bag (which COULD be a carry-on, but I'm checking it). Then as usual, my very light carry-on has a book for the plane, my pillow, jewelry, and snacks for the trip. (One year the jewelry was 16 lbs., but I have learned to bring lighter pieces.)

Brad has one big bag for clothes, a second small duffle full of kitchen/cooking items (all my stuff) to check, and he will carry the laptop with his reading material. No sweat!

Brad packs the electronics: cameras, Italy cell, adapters, converters, Italian hair dryer, ipod, GPS, and appropriate chargers.

We have lots to celebrate! Today is Brad''s 60th birthday. We leave for Italy on Friday, and Brad accepted a wonderful job offer in the desert this week! Beginning June 9, he will no longer be schlepping his bag and laptop back and forth to Pasadena, and renting a room. He will be home by 6:30 every night, and be off on Fridays!

SInce we have lived in the desert, (8 years this month), Brad has always worked in another place. He has commuted to both the Bay Area, and Pasadena, and now, first the first time, he will "live at home" 7 days a week!

Some of my friends think I had the perfect deal. They'd love their husband "out of their hair" three nights a week, and no dinner to cook. We still miss each other. I'm actually hoping Brad will fix dinner once a week, as he is becoming quite a good cook. I really don't think it will be much of an adjustment. We see a wonderful summer ahead, evening swims, walks, and all those three-day weekends!

Tonight we will celebrate our birthdays at a special dinner out. The rest of the celebrating will happen in Rome and Montisi.

This week, for the Sunday Slow Bakers, Jerry chose Lemon Semolina cookies from Dolce Italiano. It will be a happy Monday for my staff tomorrow! I used "lemon sugar" (from Bristol Farms) to roll these light, buttery lemon cookies in. It is quite a lovely dough!

The recipe made 56 cookies.

An 18 year old Italian girl tells her Mom that she has missed her period for 2 months. Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant.

Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!" The girl picks up telephone and makes a call.

Half an hour later, a Ferrari stops in front of their house. A mature and
distinguished man with grey hair and impeccably dressed in an Armani suit steps out of the of the Ferrari and enters the house. He sits in the living room with the father, mother, and the girl and tells them:

"Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem. I can't marry her because of my personal family situation but I'll take charge. I will pay all costs and provide for your daughter for the rest of her life. Additionally, if a girl is born, I will bequeath a Ferrari, 2 retail stores, a townhouse, a beachfront villa, and a $2,000,000 bank account. If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $4,000,000 bank account. If twins, they will receive a factory and $2,000,000 each. However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?"

At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him ..

"You a gonna try again!"

Saturday, we celebrated Brad's birthday all day, and had a combined birthday dinner. I LOVE birthdays, and Brad's began with cards, a small gift and coffee!

He was quite excited (more about his new job, and leaving for Italy on Friday than about his new age...).

We had a relaxing afternoon in the pool and then went to Wally's Desert Turtle for dinner.

Last night Brad and I sat outside and talked about how our Italy travel has changed in the past few years. Yes, we have SLOWED DOWN, thanks to our membership in the Slow Travel community and the philosophy of staying longer in one area and really exploring that region instead of flitting all over the boot on one trip.

We started our Italian adventures together in 2001 by driving from Milan to Lake Garda to Venice and ending up on the Amalfi coast! On another trip in 2003, we began in Venice, spent a week in Tuscany, a few days in Puglia, then Basilicata, and again ended in Capri. By 2005, we had calmed down slightly, and divided our three weeks between Tuscany, Umbria and STILL ended with a week in Positano and Capri.

That summer I became a Slow Traveler! I no longer feared not returning to Italy. We had gone from "hooked" to "obsessed", and knew we would be returning each year. We traveled to Piemonte, Emilia-Romana and sampled Liguria. We returned to Umbria, making it our own. I spent two weeks with Ida in the Garfangana.

In 2006, we were "regulars" at GTGs (Get-Togethers) closer to home, and began meeting other Slow Travelers when in Italy. I attended a GTG in Cortona, and met Nancy and Bill in Montalcino. Last summer we met Gloria and Marcel in Pisa, Sherri and Joe in Firenze. We visited with Jane, Ken and Casey twice in Tuscany. In Umbria we met Judith, Barb, Art and Mary. We also attended the Slow Travel Umbria GTG and met MANY new friends from both Italy and the U.S., as well as seeing many friends we knew from home.

Slow Travel has largely determined where we've traveled domestically as well. After attending GTGs in Brevard, NC and Vancouver, B.C., we made new wonderful friends across the U.S. and in Canada. We have hosted friends from 9 states and Canada at our GTGs in the desert. It has become an annual event. We wouldn't consider missing the Slow Bowl in Paso Robles! We spent an amazing 5 days with our buddies in Savannah.

I spoke to a close friend in the Bay Area last week on the phone and mentioned I would probably see her in June. Her immediate response was, "Oh is there a Slow Travel party up here?"

Let's look at this next vacation! (TWO more sleeps!) We will be staying in a Slow Travel friend's apartment in Rome, and spending time while there with Massimo, Biancamaria, and hopefully their daughter. We are hosting a small GTG where we will meet at the apartment for a drink, and then dine at a close-by restaurant. We are taking an "Angels and Demons" tour of Rome. Why? Because we read the book? NO, because it is given by Slow Traveler, Tony!

The second week of our trip, not only will we be meeting up with Slow Travel friends, but we will be LIVING with six of them, and we will be cooking for them (and 8 others) for a week. This wonderful opportunity for a week in Tuscany came about because of our friendship with Gail and John when Gail flew out on the spur of the moment for our desert GTG.

So I guess Slow Travel has really changed not only how we travel, but where we travel, and who we travel with!

It has been an absolute blast to spent time together with Gail and John, Jerry and Paul, Sandi and Bill, and to meet Sandi's sister, Holly, who will be with us in Montisi. This is going to be one fun group! Will that lovely, quiet medieval town EVER be the same?

I'm SO ready!

Today, my "to do " list is short: Nail appointment, bank, call ATM/credit cards to notify them of travel.

I figured since I get to be in Italy in the spring, my house/dogsitter should get to sleep on a set of sheets perfect for Italian dreams.

I am charging my BRAND NEW Canon HD Camcorder (that my very nice and generous ex-husband gave me for my birthday!).

It is around 100 degrees here, so I will have my last fix of pool time for 2 weeks.
Yes, there is a pool in Montisi, but I will be in the kitchen (and it would be too cold for me anyway)!

Then I will do what I always do...sit and WAIT until it is time to go.

I hope to blog daily from Rome. Montisi may be more difficult, but surely either Jerry, Sandi or I will have a scoop!

I am very excited to get on our way, but in reality, though we will leave our house at 9:45 this morning...Italy is eighteen hours away!

We leave Palm Springs and fly to SFO. (Farther west than when we started)

Then we fly to Amsterdam, arriving at 10:30 AM Saturday.

Finally at 12:30PM, (Saturday), we leave Amsterdam for Rome, arriving at 4:00 PM.

My big bag of clothes weighed in at 49.5. The "cooking bag" is 30 lb. We're off!

Next blog will be coming from ROMA! Ciao for now!

Ciao from Rome! We arrived after long but on-time flights. Three of our four bags arrived, but not my BIG one with almost all my clothes. Thank God the cooking stuff is here. I have a change of clothes, capris, a nightgown and underwear. Hopefully, we'll get it soon. That aside, it is so wonderful to be here. The driver was still there (even though it took a while for us to do the lost luggage thing...), and we arrived at 5:15PM, and were greeted at the apartment by Massimo and Biancamaria.

After a tour of how to work everything, and checking on wifi, we took a neighborhood walk, and picked up necessities (coffee and milk)!

Then I needed a cappucino to perk!

It worked, and we took a walk, ending up at dinner at La Sagristia.

Today was a lazy Sunday! After our morning coffee routine, we walked across the Ponte Sisto to Trastevere. There had been a brief morning shower, but the sun was out with big puffy clouds in a beautiful blue sky.

After wandering around, we got thirsty, and stopped for a drink at the

The piazza was a busy place!

How cool is this doorway to a shop?

Here they are close-up. Rope/leather and mirror squares!

More soon...

We have been eating out way through Gina's list of restaurants. Don't ever go to Rome without it! For lunch on Sunday, we had our main meal of the day at Checco e Carettiere in Trastevere.

We shared an order of "Bombolotti Carettiere" as our primi.

Gina recommended "anything fried" so we shared calamaretti and carciofi alla Giudea!

Some coffee and complementary dolci put us straight into a food coma, and home for a nap!

Sunday evening we went to Cul de Sac for wine and a snack. We weren't too hungry after our huge lunch, and this is our favorite wine bar in Rome. We discovered this in 2001, and it was actually our waiter who first introduced us to the Val d'Orcia, by telling us all about his home town of Pienza.

We literally drank our way through several regions of Italy, beginning in the Veneto with my glass of prosecco, Brad's San Giovese from Emiglia - Romana, over to Piemonte with my Gavi and down to Umbria with Brad's Montefalco Rosso. The evening ended with my Brachetto di Acqui.

Of course we worked up an appetite and had a salami plate and some gorgonzola dolce!

Our real surprise was when we paid our bill, we asked if we could by bottles "to go". We had selected three bottles, and when the waiter added them up, it was much less than we thought it would be. They give a 20% DISCOUNT if you take it unopened! SCORE! Three bottles of wine for 34 Euro!

A few Slow Travelers met at our apartment for a drink and appetizers at 6 on Monday evening. Here are Sherry (Mimi), and Shelagh (SJ).

Tony (da Roma) and Flaminia entertained us with stories of Rome.

We enjoyed getting acquainted while munching on pecorino with rosemary honey, gorgonzola dolce, and soprasatta with our wine.

Tuesday, it rained...and rained, "gatti e cani", pretty much all day and night. Let me catch you up on the situation with my luggage, since it has been DAYS since I've mentioned it. We arrived at FCO on Saturday afternoon, one bag short (my BIG one). Sunday morning at 8 AM, Alitalia called MY CELL PHONE and said they had my bag, and it would be delivered by courier that day. They were clearly going to CALL FIRST, as we are in an apartment, not a hotel where they could just drop it off if we weren't home.

Sunday night...no bag. "It will be there Monday morning at the latest." I believed them, and had only bought a toothbrush. (I had SOME pants, a change of clothes and some extra undies.) No big deal. By Sunday evening, I was disappointed, but hey, we were in ROME, and I was SO happy seeing and doing and eating and drinking, that it was still ok! I used Brad's shampoo, etc., and he had packed the hair dryer. I wore jeans again. Monday, I let Alitalia buy me some makeup and two tops. We were "in the hood", and had the cell handy at all times. They said it would be here "late afternoon", so we came back to the apartment, and got ready for the GTG. Massimo called and said they had called HIM, AFTER they attempted to deliver my bag in the morning! Excuse me, we were at the corner having coffee with our cell phone on!
I decided Alitalia would love to pay for the cute shoes I "had to buy" yesterday!

We were given a new window of 9-1 on Tuesday. After coffee, we hung out in the apartment, had lunch from our provisions, read our books, and watched it rain.

At 12 :15, my bag was delivered! YEAH!

So what does one do on a VERY rainy afternoon? GO SHOPPING, of course! It is dry in the stores, and we had our 2 Euro umbrellas from the street vendor! We visited Gusto, a lovely kitchen shop, where I bought a huge jar of honey with pepperocino. Then I had a laser strike at Furla, with a wonderful bag AND a new wallet! Next, I found a lovely green linen outfit (pants and jacket), and a sweater set.

We relaxed in a cafe until time for dinner. It was a perfect Palmabella rainy day in Rome!

Continuing on our "Stella restuarant tour of Roma" brought us to dinner last night at Myosotis, near the Piazza della Rotunda (Pantheon neighborhood). It is a pretty restaurant with a "nuovo Roman menu".

We were served bruschetta with the owner's homemade Umbrian olive oil when we sat. Brad started with stracci con tomatoes, olives, and basil, while I had the BEST and lightest gnocchi of my life in a gorgonzola sauce.

For secondi, Brad had a veal medallion , wrapped in procsiutto with an asparagus puree, and I had grilled lamb.

We drank a bottle of Alois Lageder Pinot Grigio di Alto Aldige, and enjoyed our dining experience very much. It was POURING when we got out, so we grapped a taxi to our corner bar, and had coffee and grappa half a block from home. Tutto bene!

WARNING: This post may cause extreme hunger!

Yesterday we had a rainy trip by taxi to the Testacchio market. The rain was on and off, but we found some great little shops where I bought a few ingredients for my cooking in Montisi this coming week. Volpetti is a foodie's dream. I went a little "pazzo". We were offered many tastes, but when I chose four cheeses and ordered a KILO of each, they REALLY gave us kid glove service. Everything was so delicious, I was like a kid in a candy store!

After our rain drenched food shopping trip to Testacchio, we took a nap, then ventured out for dinner at Vinando (another Gina recommendation). OMG! There is a huge menu of "small plates" to taste along with an enormous wine list. We began with my stuffed fiori di zucchini (filled with ricotta and basil), which were light and crisp. Brad had a plate of bufalo mozzarella with olive crositni.

For our entrees, Brad had vitello con arancia, and I had vitello saltimbocca with a side of grilled zucchini.

On Thursday, we arrived at Piazza del Popolo at 9 AM in time for a cup of coffee before we met Tony da Roma, and our group for our tour, following the story in Dan Brown's Angels and Demons.We began at Santa Maria del Popolo, where the first bishop was killed and branded with the word "EARTH". We saw the private chapel containing the statue of the angel which guided character Robert Langdon across Rome to try to save the second bishop from his death.

Tony did a great job of pointing out a plethora of inaccuracies in Brown's book. Next we traveled (by air conditioned van) to St Peter's square at the Vatican. We learned all about the Swiss Guard, and saw the imbedded plaque designating wind: AIR.

The next stop was Santa Maria della Vittoria, where a bishop was burned, and Langdon was almost suffocated in a sarcaphagus.

Here is Saint Teresa "in ecstasy":

Thursday night, we got dressed up and had a "post birthday dinner" for Brad. I chose another of Gina's recommended restaurants for a special night out, and indeed it was!
We took a taxi across town to Agata and Romeo. This is near Santa Maria Maggiore. As we got close to the church, there were MOBS of people lining the street. Our taxi driver told us the Pope was coming to say mass in just a few minutes. As we got to the front of the church, we could see all the cardinals and priests sitting out in front, and many carabiniere and polizia in place for the Pope's arrival!

We arrived at the restaurant, and rang the doorbell to enter. It is lovely inside, and you are greeted by pink peonies everywhere, and on each table.

We began with a glass of spumante Brut. Look at the beautiful oval water glasses!

We are leaving Rome this morning, and I won't have wifi in Montisi, but I will take lots of photos and post when I can! In the meantime, here are a few "Rome Moments":

Born to be Wild:

No, he wasn't after us. These are used only for high speed autostrada chases or organ donors.

Read the menu before ordering a "grande".

Palmabella makes a ragu: