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August 8, 2007

Missing Italy Part 1: A Little Background

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I grew up in an "Italian village"...in California.

Let me explain. My mom was the youngest girl of ten siblings, five sisters, and five brothers. The older siblings were all born in Italy. Mom was born in New York. All five sisters moved to California in the 1940s. They came out to visit a friend for a vacation, and one by one settled in Fresno, California. This is in the middle of the agricultural San Joaquin Valley, where much of the nations' fresh produce, especially fruit and nuts come from. It looks A LOT like Puglia, where my grandparents were from. I can see why they felt at home. The sisters bought houses very close together. My mom, dad and I lived a few miles away. There was a twenty year age difference between she and her oldest sister, Aunt Antoinette. So when I was born, my mom's first (and only) child, when she was almost 45, it was quite a novalty to have a baby in the family. All these aunts and uncles were grandparent age. My first cousins were grown and married. Some of them had children my age. For the next 20 years, I was called, "the baby".

Food was SO important. Every Sunday, we went to Aunt Annie and Uncle Natale's house for pranzo. Her back yard was across the alley from Aunt Antoinette and Uncle Leo's. Across the street was Aunt Mary. Close by was Aunt Jenny (Giovanna) and Uncle Alberto (my Godfather). We lived the farthest away (10 minutes by car). The neighbors were often part of the "extended family" and also sources of food. Next door was the baker/pastry chef from Naples who kept us all in cannoli and sfogliatella. Martha and Nick across the alley had a garden full of tomatoes and zucchini. The aunts had the fruit trees divided up. When Aunt Annie's apricots and peaches were ripe, they canned jars for the winter. When the plums were ready, we all made jam. When Aunt Jenny's almonds were ready, we all went there to pick and shell nuts, and eat dinner.
Mom grew basil, lemons and asparagas.

Uncle Albert had close friends who owned a pasta factory. They kept us in dry pasta.
10-pound boxes of various size and shape noodles and macaroni would show up, and be divided. Uncle Nat was Godfather to a local winery owner. He brought cases for all. I could go on and on. Someone grew melons, someone else oranges, figs were plentyful during the summer months, first green, then black Mission.

The sisters were all great cooks, but each had their specialty. Mom was the baker of delicious pastry and coffeecakes. Aunt Annie made cavatelli (like orchetti) by hand (by the hundreds) with a quick flick of her arthritic fingers. Aunt Jenny had a sweet tooth and made desserts. Aunt Mary was lasagna queen. Each of them thought they made the best sauce. Every Sunday, Aunt Annie would ask, "Isn't this the BEST sauce I ever made?" We were afraid to disagree! I liked Mom's meatballs best, and her rich pork and beef ragu. She made the best cutlets, and fried calamari, and carbonara.

Mom (the only one who married a non-Italian) introduced the concepts of more "American" food, so they came to our house for prime rib and mashed potatoes, or stuffed pork roasts. Everyone talked about food ALL the TIME. They were either cooking, eating, planning the next meal, or talking about what they had just eaten or were going to eat. Every morning that they weren't planning a family meal together, they would call and ask,"What are you making today?" The inevitable next line would be, "That sounds good, and I'll bring some______".

"The aunts", as I called them were kind of poor. They had small houses, older appliences, and had to really watch their money. None of them, (including Mom) had more than an 8th grade education. They worked in the garment district of NYC making assembly line clothing until they married. Aunt Mary hand-beaded wedding gowns for Dior before coming to California. None of them drove, or were ever on an airplane. But they had everything they needed. They were content, and spoiled me with love, attention, and beautiful baby clothes! They looked just like the ladies I see in their windows in Italy, with their housedress and apron, or in their Sunday best in a church pew with their rosary beads.

I remember summer nights the best. Since I was out of school, and both my parents, and ALL the aunts and uncles were retired, we could get together more frequently.
ALL the aunts and we had a "summer kitchen". This was either a separate building, or a remodel of part of the garage. It was used for canning, frying, anything messy, cooking the Thanksgiving turkey to free up the oven in the house for other things, and summer eating. It had air conditioning, all appliances, and a huge table for parties and regular meals.

After dinner, the women usually sat together outside, and the men went to the vine covered terrace to play cards ("Scopa", or "Sweep" in English). I would translate or signal my dad when my uncles started cheating in Italian. Then I'd go back to the women to see if it was time for fruit or cookies. There were ALWAYS taralle with anise seeds. There were ALWAYS biscotti. We hung out. Friends and neighbors walked over. We never watched TV on those nights. It was neighborhood passagiata! Sometimes the "party" moved to another yard of a friend or neighbor. More food!

My family referred to US as "the Italians". EVERYONE ELSE (regardless of ethnicity) were called "the Americans". (This included my father.) I was adamant about being one of the Italians. They would tease me about my Germanic coloring. I would scream, "I'm Italian!" They would laugh, encourage me, and then say, "Yes, you are 100% Italian". My father would roll his eyes and go listen to the Giants play baseball on the radio.

At school I had prosciutto or soprassata and cheese sandwiches. I had fritattas. I had zucchini and eggs, or pizza rustica. I saw bologna for the first time in college, and asked what was wrong with the mortatella?

We celebrated birthdays, feast days (Palm Sunday was mine), and holidays. Of course everyone cooked extra, in case someone stopped by. People stopped by all the time. Having "company" was the norm. I learned from my mother to always have "a few quarts of sauce with meat, a dessert or two, and enough other side dishes that you could throw together a dinner or two on a moment's notice if someone drops in".
My mom spoke Italian (or at least their Barese dialect) when speaking to her sisters.
They spoke English when my dad was at the table, so he would not be left out. They even switched to a Naples dialect when the neighbor was there to make her feel at home. They switched to "proper Italian" when another northern Italian friend was present (I don't think they ever mastered Piemontese).

My point of all this rambling is that THIS was my experience growing up in California.
Every time I arrive in Italy, I feel like I have come home.

Missing Italy Part 2: Sauce in the Freezer

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This is the hard part to write about (talk about, think about).
(If you didn't already read "Missing Italy Part 1: Some Background", please start there.)

For 35 years, I guess I have been trying in different ways to recreate this "Big happy Italian family". Though I was not blessed with biological children, a HUGE sadness in my life, I have always been drawn to big noisy families. My substitute has been friends, dinners, and parties.

In many ways, I have become my mother! Mom loved to cook and entertain. She planned, she poured over cookbooks. She baked. She "over did it". She had lots of dishes! She had two freezers, and two refrigerators. She bought in large quantities BEFORE there was Costco.

When Mom died, I used her stash of paper towels, tin foil, plastic wrap and waxed paper for FIVE YEARS before I had to buy any. I gave away at least 20 boxes of band-aids and dozens of new toothbrushes.

I have life-long friends (sorority sisters) who are in some ways like an extended family. Though we do not see each other often, we connect by phone and email. We visit a couple times a year.

My "Italian sister", Ida, and I talk daily, often sharing recipes, pouring over menus for dinner, holidays, and entertaining. This was how we first bonded on the beach in Maui 15 years ago. Jerry and I, and many on the ST food boards do this through sharing recipes there or on our blogs.

My therapist friends and I connect over other similarities and professional respect.

My REAL cousin, Palma, in New York, and I share food stories, and memories of our parents, aunts and uncles during our monthly phone chats.

I have appetizers and sauce in the freezer, desserts and side dishes ready "in case", but no one has EVER stopped by and stayed for dinner (OK, I can think of ONE TIME!). My desert friends rarely cook, and eat out much of the time. Don't get me wrong. I value our privacy and have boundaries, but would like more spontaneous getting together. Last minute invitations are fun. Brad and I continue to seek connection with those whose priorities are NOT just money, things, and competition. We have made a few close friends in the desert. We love those we have met who are REAL, honest, vulnerable, and non-judgmental. We miss them as they are away half the year.

In my hapy, naive world, sharing what you have with your friend is better than trying to have more than your friend. Friends don't play "tit for tat" or "keep score" on kindness. If I invite someone for dinner, it is not a contest, and they don't OWE me anything.

In many ways we have found a sense of community on Slow Travel. Through this community of travelers, we have met so many great people. This is a wonderful "Italy Connection" of people who either live there, or have traveled there and love it as we do.

After three years in our new home and community, after hosting parties, inviting neighbors for drinks, dinner, etc., I have been invited into three homes (two included Brad). In our recent three-week trip to Italy, we were invited to share meals or come over by six families of people we had never met before. THIS is the connection I don't find at home.

SO, yes, we joke about missing the pasta and gelato in Italy. We miss the stunning scenery, the piazzas, the passagiata, the pace, the three-hour meals with wine. We miss the countryside, the hilltowns, the magnificant cities, the art, music and architecture. All those things I can wait for. It is exciting to look forward to them on our next visit.

But, DAILY, I miss the connections, the relationships, the sharing, the kindness, the "Buon Giornos", the smiles to a stranger, the children playing safely while "the village" watches out for them. I miss the generosity. I miss having those who "get it" that this is NORMAL, not an exception. Daily I try to create those kinds of connections in my life at home. I will die trying. In the meantime, I will cook Italian, use the ST chatroom and GTGs as my piazza and passagiata, and continue to visit Italy once or twice a year.

I dream of and long for the hospitality, warmth and comfort of Italy.

If you're in the neighborhood (or want to visit), call first, then if we're home, come by.
There will be new sauce in the freezer.

March 25, 2008

Dreaming of Italy... Soon!

51 days away, and I am dreaming of Italy!

I long to see road signs like this:

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And hill towns like this:

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And eat bread like this:

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Soon! I have begun the Italy countdown!

April 26, 2008

Coffee and Planning

Come have a cup of cappucino with me.

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You'll never guess what I'm CONSTANTLY thinking about: Here's a hint!

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Right! Italy in 21 days. Three weeks from now I will be in Rome for a week, and then off to

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Today I am organizing all of my "printed material: itinerary, car rental, hotel confirmation for one night in Florence, restaurant lists for Rome, driving directions, and of course my RECIPES to feed the troops at the villa! I have a nice little binder so I will not be shuffling papers in the passenger seat while I read the GPS and ask Brad to "take it easy".

If I talk about something else, will you stay for another cup?

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April 28, 2008

Italian Breakfasts

My typical breakfast at home consists of several large mugs of coffee. I have very little interest in food in the morning...UNLESS I am in Italy!

Breakfast in Italy can be anything from 2-3 lattes, to a full meal!
Last summer in Montalcino I would walk the empty streets around 6AM, and then was there when the caffe opened at 7.

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I enjoyed a bit more on the lovely outdoor breakfast terrace in Torino.

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Sometimes breakfast looks more like lunch. Here is one morning's breakfast plate in Bologna:

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Continue reading "Italian Breakfasts" »

April 30, 2008

Italian Dreams

16 more sleeps!

I dream of Italy most nights now. I go to sleep imagining that we are in Italy, so when I remember a dream, there is usually a bit of something Italian that pops into the scene.
Sometimes I see countryside. I'm a real sucker for those vineyards and olive trees.

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Sometimes I "remember" a certain place or image.
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What a surprise...I dream of FOOD!
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Mostly, I think of spending lovely days and nights enjoying Italian life with Brad! (This was our anniversary in Umbria in 2005.)
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May 2, 2008

Villa d'Este, Tivoli

When I think of Rome, I also think of a lovely day trip to the beautiful Villa d'Este.

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Grab a beverage of choice, and enjoy a few minutes in this SPECTACULAR setting.

When we were last there, we saw a bride and groom. Oh what stunning photos they must have!

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June 22, 2008

I've been scrapbooking...

MY WALLS!

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Sandi gave all of us these wood letters spelling "Montisi" several months ago. I have finally used mine. I painted them green, added some flowers, and did a grouping of photos in my guest room with poppy pictures in green frames, and 3 people photos.

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Next, I took some food photos of fruits and veggies, and framed them for a long, thin space of wall in my kitchen.
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Finally, I take lots of photos of flowers in Italy. I made a huge collage frame of "Fiori di Italia" for the guest room.

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One more way to "bring Italy home"!

July 17, 2008

Missing Italy Again

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We got a lovely surprise delivered: sunflowers from Gail and John, as an appreciation for our kitchen help in Montisi. The card read, "Thought you might be missing these."

I AM!!!

Last July we were in Umbria looking at these:

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Don't they make you smile?

I got a great "poppy fix" in May, and next July we will be back in Umbria with our guests from PalmabellasItaly.

The good news is we will be back to Italy in 45 days!

For right now, these put a smile on my face!

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Is anyone else missing Italy today?

August 2, 2008

Waking up in Italy

One of the simple pleasures (and there are SO many...) of being in Italy, is just waking up in the morning! Even in my pre-caffinated state we call "stunnato" in my mother's dialect, I love early morning. The light, the mist or sfumato, sometimes an incredible sunrise, are all possibilities. So is the smell of the espresso and fresh bread or pastry.

I remember my first morning at Diana's:
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It was a perfect Piemonte sunrise!

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Of course, mornings are lovely in Positano:
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in Umbria:

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in Capri:

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in Venice:

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Tuscany:
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and finally, this shot from our room at Genius Loci!

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See what you miss when you sleep in? As I've said before, I can sleep at home! But afternoon NAPS are good!

Just 31 more sleeps, and I'll wake up on Lake Como!

August 19, 2008

The Story of Luigi the Seagull

Once upon a time there was a little seagull named Luigi. He lived far from his homeland of Italia on a quiet beach near San Diego.

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He so missed his old life in Italy, and would give anything to go back. Here is Luigi dreaming of his home across the huge continent and an even bigger sea.

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Sadly, he went for his morning swim.

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He felt refreshed, and began his walk on the beach.

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He had a bath...and an idea!

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Soon, he met some of his American friends.

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None of them wanted to play cards or go for a doppio. He went over to his buddy, Herb by the castello. " Look at these lousy monuments", he said. "Herb, want to fly with me to Little Italy? "

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The two seagulls visited Little Italy, and sipped the remains of a capuccino and some cannoli crumbs. "Molto buono!"

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Luigi was happy for the rest of the day. Domani, they will visit a local pizza place, and maybe some GELATO!

October 17, 2008

If I Were in Italy...

If I were in Italy this morning, I would have been at a favorite cafe on a tiny piazza having a great cafe latte and a yummy cornetto.

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I would read, and watch the beautiful Italian bambini play. (children were photographed with parent's consent)

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Then I might walk to the market and buy something luscious to eat.

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Maybe pick up something fun for dinner...

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It would be

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October 22, 2008

More Ceramics?

Last summer I bought a set of Rampini dishes in Radda. When we were in Florence in May, I stopped in the Rampini store there, and added 8 coffee mugs and a cream and sugar set. It takes a while for them to be shipped. They said it would probably be August. Well, as soon as we left again for Italy again in September, the package arrived. Of course we were not here to sign for it, so Fed Ex left three notices on my door (that my friend took off for me). I was sure they had gone back to Italy, as the last notice was September 8, and we returned September 23! I emailed Rampini my disappointing news.

About an hour later, Fed Ex called, and said they had received a call from Rampini, saying we were home. They delivered my package that afternoon. Who says the Italians aren't efficient?

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May 29, 2009

Sogno di Italia

Yes, I often dream of Italy, and not only at night! Here are a few daydream places I have found recently to think about before we take off in 27 more days:

I can completely see myself living in this charming yellow kitchen outside of Cortona!

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Maybe you would like to join me in this sweet little villa in Trequanda?

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Or how about living in this cute little Umbrian farmhouse outside of Todi?

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I bet you would come visit me and join me for a glass of prosecco on the terrace...

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or a capuccino in the "conservatory".

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Since we are dreaming... I'll show you my favorite Umbrian fantasy property that is ready to move into. Just follow me!

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I have a "thing" for courtyards! Can you imagine some antipasti and vino here?

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Or perhaps you would prefer this view at sunset?

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Come on in the kitchen door.

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I can live with green!

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The painting has to go, but there is an inviting living room,

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and a charming family room.

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There is even a a cozy "library" to settle down with a good book.

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Dining room...of course!

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The three bedrooms (one with a fireplace) are also lovely!
How about a dip in the pool before we leave my fantasy?

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As soon as we win the lottery, I'll be packing up the ceramics!

Photos courtesy of www.immobiliare.com

June 10, 2009

Italian Language Meet-up Group of the Desert

Last month, Brad and I joined the Italian Language Meet-up Group of the Desert. They are fairly new, and meet twice a month, either at a restaurant, or at someone's home. At our first meeting, we all got to know each other by saying a little something about ourselves in Italian. There are all different skill levels in speaking Italian, from Brad, who is a true beginner to being completely fluent. Everyone is very patient, and helpful, so it is safe to struggle and try out your skills. At our next meeting in two weeks, we are meeting at an Italian restaurant, with Italian speaking waiters, and each person will share a recipe, or something about a dish they like in Italian.

We began the evening with hot artichoke dip and prosecco or wine.

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Dinner was interesting for me, as half the group are either vegetarian or vegan. I actually prepared a meal without cheese in every dish!

Brad grilled lots of veggies.

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We had a big spinach salad with berries and pecans.

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There was grilled flank steak for the carnivores.

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The fresh berries were wonderful, drizzled with a little Italian honey.

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Bean-Corn-Rice Salad was a hit with everyone.

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Dessert: Another fresh berry tart!

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Part of the evening's activities included a blind tasting...of olive oil! We tasted 5 olive oils, and three balsamic vinegars. Favorites were Mauro's Umbrian oil, Pasolivo Tangerine oil, and Fig Balsamic vinegar.

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Here are some of our group members:

Chris and Cindy have traveled to various regions in Italy.

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"Enrico" (Harry) and Armando have lovely pronunciation, and continue to practice their skills for a future trip to Italia.

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Caterina studied Italian in Perugia, and Diana plans to WALK through Umbria next year!

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Tony's skills are very good, and he will be staying with Ego during part of our trip. Frank (our meet-up organizer) owns an apartment and a "country house" in Siracusa, Sicily, where he lived the past five years.

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We look forward to many more evenings with the group to chat and practice speaking Italian!

July 15, 2009

Travel Day

We left our hotel at 7 am, left FCO at 9:30 am, JFK at 5:30 pm, and arrived in San Diego at 7 pm, California time. LONG DAY! We drove back to Palm Desert, played with Ego, and went straight to sleep.

I always seem to forget how FAR we are from Italy! I slept MUCH of the way home!

July 28, 2009

How Do You Know?

that you have the SWEETEST husband in the world?

Saturday, it was VERY hot, I was VERY lazy, but we needed groceries. I sent Brad off to Costco with my list. He returned with everything on my list...


AND...

Continue reading "How Do You Know?" »

November 16, 2009

Returning to Bologna

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It is official! I'll be back in Bologna the end of May 2010. I am booked for three weeks of private Italian language classes. I will be in an apartment in a city I love that has fabulous food. Since Brad will not be with me, there will be no excuses for speaking English. I will be forced to put my skills to use, and have daily lessons and practice. I better start NOW, reviewing what I do know!

Brad and I will return later in the year for our vacation to Italy.