Escape from Grey Gardens

I suppose I asked for this when I started referring to our house as Grey Gardens, but we seem destined to become like Big and Little Edie, the residents of Grey Gardens' namesake. We don't yet have raccoons living in the attic and if we did I'm pretty sure I wouldn't be feeding them bags of Wonder Bread, but it sometimes feels like that kind of thing is just around the corner.

One evening a week or so ago we heard a kind of a yowl outside, and Gary, never one to trust the obvious, said it was a bird--maybe a cat bird. I thought it was a cat. Later he went to bed and I heard it again, plus some scuffling sounds on the front porch. Scout, who was up watching TV with me, seemed to agree we were hearing cat sounds. So I turned on the porch light and peeped through the curtain, and there were 2 tiny tiny kittens huddling behind one of the porch chairs. It was raining, and they looked so darn forlorn, mewing their agony into the night. When I went outside to investigate they disappeared.

However, we just so happened to have some kitty chow in the pantry leftover from the last kitty who showed up here, and the next day I wet it down a bit (they were so small I wasn't sure they could chew yet) and left it plus a bowl of water on the porch. Nobody touched it. I tried bread soaked in a little milk; no customers. But the next morning the kitty chow had definitely been sampled. Could have been just about anything that did it--I wouldn't put it past the dogs of course, and we do have raccoons, coyotes, armadillos, skunks, possums, etc. etc. around... But I cleaned and refilled the bowls and when I went to put them back out, a little head popped up from under the porch where the sego palm is growing up against it. And then another. I looked everywhere for a mom or more kittens, got as far under the house as I could, but no luck.

Long story short they seem to be getting stronger and I think we got to them in time. They will pop out from under the porch to eat or even play a bit if I meow at them. I bought a big bag of kitten food and they are eating well. The smaller of the two (I am partial to that one) is the braver but seems to have a hurt eye, or maybe it didn't fully develop. I am working up to touching them, using the same method I used with Hattie, sitting patiently with treats in my hand. I want to get them to a vet, but it will take some doing to catch them first.

And yes, we will probably keep them, but they will have to be outdoor cats since I am so very allergic. I haven't named them yet because I don't know the sexes but I am contemplating the names Edie (of course!), Dixie, Shackelton (for Sir Ernest) and Cinclare (for the sugar mill down the road).

Edie or Shackleton

Dixie or Cinclare

Grey Gardens pet total thus far:
3 dogs, 2 kittens, 1 parrot
all of which were strays or unwanted

If we count the critters that aren't really pets but we feed them or try to help out, add, say, hundreds just for the birds, and then there's the bunnies, and stop me before I am in the attic with a loaf of Wonder Bread.