Vagabond Artist

In 2005 my life fell apart, I had everything anyone ever wanted: a life in Florence, Italy created by myself. Everything I owned i bought with the money made from selling my paintings and I painted only what I wanted to. I had a wonderful JAck Russell Terrier a very nice Italian husband that was a little too critical but could cook like a god, a house at the most beautiful beach in Tuscany, my own studio-gallery, property, friends, connections, a vegetable garden, bla bla bla.

In 2005 my life fell away from me. I had a health problem and had to think about it for months, almost a year before I was operated on; and then there were some really critical situations with close family that I could only sit back and watch from far away, hands bound together. I had months to reflect on my situation but dove into the internet and in particular became addicted to the Slowtalk message board... it kept my mind occupied and I met alot of very interesting people that I adore like Kim who has inspired this entry.

In 2005 my life made no sense anymore, I tried to hold onto things but a trip to NY,NY crashed me into the crisis that came in 2006. The BIG BANG effect. Everything was sensless, the dream life that I had created was empty. One night I dreamt of driving down a highway at full speed and the road suddenly ended, in front of me was a very big body of water that did not show the other side. It seemed like a very big lake, not an ocean, but then again if you think about how small the planet earth is in the universe, it could have been an ocean. We fly accross the ocean in seven hours, so why not an ocean.

BIG BANG!!!!

What did I decide I wanted?

There were three things that are very private and I will not say them here but, when I said to myself in 2005, after surgery those 3 things, within a year those three things came to me FULL POWER. Is that too many commas in one sentence?

I have nothing of what i had before. The things I miss are the specific Jack Russell and the vegetable garden but my life, with so much less is so fullfilling and so rich. There is no comparaison. I must say that I never hesitated but just dove into that big body of water.
___

Now what do I want?

BIG BANG!!!!

...